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Random Videos
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Woman does ‘mouth-to-beak’ to save chicken
ARKADELPHIA, Ark. (AP)
Thank goodness, I was getting tired of doing posts about people from Kentucky. And I would have given anything to have been a fly on the wall during the town counsel meeting where they decided that if Philadelphia and Arkansas had a little bastard baby, it would be called Arkadelphia, and that would be the name of their 12 family trailer park.
–Sometimes a chicken does have lips, just not her own. Marian Morris saved her brother’s exotic chicken, Boo Boo, by administering “mouth-to-beak” resuscitation on the fowl after it was found floating face down in the family’s pond.
What kind of name for an exotic chicken is Boo Boo. Boo Boo sounds like a retarded cow, or a retarded ghost. An exotic chicken should be named something exotic like Bubbles, or Shaniqua. It also helped that a family pond in Arkansas consists of a plastic children’s Dukes of Hazard wading pool or a spit-can.
Morris, a retired nurse, said she hadn’t had any practice with CPR in years, but that she was interested to see if she “still had it.”
Does that mean she wanted to see if she could still make a dead chicken come to life with a wiggle of her jiggly country ass and a little tongue action from her hot Vaseline coated lips?
“I breathed into its beak, and its dad-gum eyes popped open,” Morris said. “I breathed into its beak again, and its eyes popped open again. “I said, ‘I think this chicken’s alive now. Keep it warm.’”
I actually won my 5th grade spelling bee with the word dad-gum. Some other words I correctly spelled on my path to glory were dog-nabbit, jumpin-jahoosephats, hooooooeeeey, and Listerine.
Morris said she was pleased to find that the bird she saved was an “exotic,” and not just an ordinary chicken.
Ordinary chickens aren’t as “grateful”, and don’t go out of their way to “return the favor”. Exotic chickens on the other hand give some of the best lap dances you’d ever want to get from poultry.
The chicken is called Boo Boo, because she is easily frightened. The family thought Boo Boo was startled and flopped into the pond.
The chicken is called Boo Boo because that is the only word that their 12-year-old son knows.
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